Moonlight Dwelling

 1. Why is Dale Cooper obsessed with coffee?

 2. Who eats all the donuts at the Sheriff's Office? There are only five people there and six when you count Dale.

 3. Why did Shelly marry Leo? Did she lose a bet or something because he has loser written all over him not to mention the whole wife beating thing which isn't too appealing.

 4. Why is the washing machine in the backyard? I guess it would be handy to have it there so you can go back and forth to hang out the wash without having to get a basket and get a workout in. So come on folks forget about the basement stick it in the yard.

 5. What is up with Leo's hair? Pick a color dude since this isn't a flattering hairdo for you. Also would it kill you to let your hair down once in a while. No wonder you're so angry with your hair pulled back tight which leads to headaches and grouchiness. No wonder you're swinging that sock around.

 6. Is Diane afraid of the phone? Is that why Dale always talks to her on the tape recorder? This would be pre Felecity so is he the early version of Sally? Maybe she's afraid of communication that isn't done by tape.

 7. Why didn't Laura break up with Bobby to be with James? Would it have killed her to do that? Okay she ends up dead but not at Bobby's hands.

 8. Why didn't Bobby break up with Laura to be with Shelly? Are you sensing a pattern here about the people in this crazy ass town?

 9. Why didn't Shelly leave Leo? She could have gone to the cops or hell maybe she could have asked Norma to ask Hank to kill him or something. He gets credit for shooting him but that didn't work out so well since he survived.

10. Why did James get over Laura so quick and fall in love with Donna? The girl's body is barely cold and you're already hooking up with the best friend? What does that say about you as a boyfriend and you as a best friend?

11. Why did Donna date Mike? I don't like Mike although I thought it was amusing when he started dating Nadine. I just don't get the attraction. Actually he sort of reminds me a little bit of Whitney from Smallville.

12. If cherry pie is gonna kill ya would you really be suggesting it to people unless they're your mortal enemies or something? Personally I think cherry shows up way too much. Come on people there are other flavors besides cherry so why do I have to choose between that and green when I want some Nyquill or some other cold related item?

13. Drapes aren't loud so why would you need a completely silent drape runner? Sure there are times when the sound of a curtain opening and closing drives me insane so I end up at the hardware store at four in the morning talking about cotton balls but don't forget the grease to make them absolutely silent.

14. How did the fish get in the percolator? What is a percolator? A coffee pot? A special coffee pot? Is it just me or was practically everyone cheating on their wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend?

15. Why was Laura such a slut? It does make you wonder about the homecoming queen? What dark secrets is she hiding?

16. Why does the Log Lady carry around a log? Is this some homage to her husband? Was he like a log in the bed? Can you understand the log? It seems to talk to her and see things or is she just a crazy that speaks through her log?

17. Did Norma bake those pies? Maybe in between hooking up with Ed she baked pies. It must be lonely when you're husband's in the big house and your lover's married to a total wacko going on about silent drape runners.

18. Do bees have metabolisms? If they do how can I get one?

19. Soap in a sock to beat your wife with? That's just weird and kind of creepy if the one swinging it happens to be Leo Johnson.

20. It seems like the only couple that isn't cheating would be the Haywoods.

21. Dr Jacoby looks more like a mental patient instead of a doctor. Would you trust this man with your sanity?

I'll add as I watch through Twin Peaks. Hey it's been a while so I'm enjoying watching them and marveling at how weird this town happens to be and of course hopefully some inspiration will sprinkle down so I can continue on that Passions/Twin Peaks crossover.